The "Fun" Family

Perhaps I'm coming late to this, but it seems that the predominant source of "fun" in the culture has centered itself in the family experience. I bet this has been the case for some time now, but my own social perspective has been shaped by the culture of the 50's, and that was not the case then. At least not from the male perspective.

Although Playboy came out in the early 50's, the real sexual revolution came after that. The availability of the birth control pill made "casual" or "no strings" sex a genuine lifestyle. This was supposed to be the "fun" part of adulthood (although by then I was already married and the father of two).

But even for the guys who missed it, like me, just being free and able to taste the pleasures of single life was considered the "fun" part before the "responsibilities" of married life took over. I don't remember any of the young men my age who got married who had the expectation that they were just entering the fun part. Being the adult meant that this part was over, and you had the responsibility of having a career and raising your family. Having children was the most important part of that, but I don't think the culture had yet defined it as a "fun" experience.

Part of the culture of the 50's and early 60's was the playboy or "bachelor" icon, like Steve McQueen in The Thomas Crown Affair or James Bond in the 60's. Even earlier, in the 50's, the swinging bachelor, often an older adult like Bob Cummings or Charlie Farrell in My Little Margie, was a familiar TV sitcom character. Having a gorgeous babe, or two or three, was the fantasy of teenage boys or the poor married shlub who toiled for the family paycheck. Being the daddy meant leaving behind any chance of actually living like those icons.

Then, sometime in the late seventies I suppose, the "Family Experience" began to assume a dominant position in the culture and the economy. Perhaps, after the rootless armies of babyboomers actually started raising their own families, it became apparent that the future of marketing to this dominant sector of the economy was to appeal to them in a different way. After all, they suddenly needed to make money for things other than bachelorhood and casual sex. And so, with an almost imperceptible stealth, a new kind of fantasy life was formed. That of the joys, the delights and the life-fulfilling adventure of parenthood. I think that by the time the Steve Martin movie of that title was released, in 1987 I think, the fantasy had already taken over the top spot.

Movies are, as ever, the most reliable litmus of the culture. The endless stream of animated fare with talking animals has conquered the multiplex, and even outgrosses the teenage date movies about stalking maniacs, or the new staple of teenage fantasies, comic book superheroes.

The animation boom fits right in with the other shared family joys: taking the tykes to the restaurant, the family vacations in national parks, the Disney on Broadway, the soccer practice and, of course, the endless recording of every moment in the latest gadget from the mall, much of which will wind up on youtube.

Not to forget the necessity of a cellphone for every family member, who will multiply the family joys by describing their moment-to moment experiences to each other, in detail, even if they will see each other only a half hour later.

It has been that way ever since. Today, the swinging bachelor of the past has been replaced by the misfit daydreamers, like Seth Rogan and his buddies, who perpetuate rituals preserved from high school, more out of habit than pleasure, but who are only waiting for some gorgeous, aggressive babe to drag them, kicking and screaming, into the only true happiness they will ever know, raising a family.